Terms of Sentience
by Lady Papillon Rose
Summary: Suddenly being thrust into the madness of the Motosuwa household forces emotions Kotoko has struggled to hide for the longest to surface, however, at what price does the ability to feel come?
1. Memories: This Room

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Author's Note: This is my first fanfic, so be kind if at all possible, and recognize that non-constructive flames piss off the powers that be! This story has a yuri-style tinge to it, however, seeing as it deals with two tiny persocoms, there won't be anything lemony in the least, so don't look for it because you won't find it here. There are also...in a twisted sort of way, in-fanfic fanfics. Let me explain what I mean by that. The story itself is set to a fanfic being read and written by different people to be discovered in later chapters--It isn't who you think it is. I assure you that. The fanfic is fictional and you won't find it anywhere but here, but I guess that means the series is kinda crossing over with itself, in a way...hm. There are also blurbs of information written by characters you'll recognize (such a a report by Minoru..., etc), to be used in the same manner as 'blurbs' or used in the work of say..Michael Crichton: to aid the plot along, or explain why certain events occur in the manner that they do. Any author notes either preceding or following chapters will be denoted by "-----", to prevent confusion between what I'm writing and what our 'unknown' character is writing, seeing as ff.net doesn't allow a separation of author's notes and content. And, yes, the relationship is between Kotoko and Sumomo, so if you're a psycho yuri-yaoi hater, go burn down a synagogue or whatever it is that you derive amusement from.  
  
Disclaimer: Chobits belongs to Clamp, but all the info blurbs and randomness belongs to ME. ::histrionic laughter at finally having ownership of something::  
  
Terms of Sentience  
  
By Papi-chan

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Memories  
  
A 'City With No People' fanfic by k-sama  
  
Disclaimer: This is my first fanfic here on clampfiction.net, so please be civil, and gentle, and understand that any flames I recieve will be used to torch not only your personal belongings, but your physical being as well. You've been warned. I own no part of the 'City With No People' series, which is copyrighted, in it's entirety, to Hibiya Chitose, however, I do own the concept.  
  
Author's Note: I've noticed that a lot of fanfiction dealing with this series focuses on the lighter part of the story--the ability to find happiness, even by persocoms; love between a persocom and a human, etc. Whatever. However, I decided to delve into the darker side of the story, the part that can not possibly have a happy ending. If all persocoms reserve the ability to harbor, at least to a degree, love for another, can the emotion, when experienced by a persocom, still be defined as being love? And what if the persocom has be taught to believe that it is just that, an it, not a being capable of experiencing emotions? Would it recognize them for what they are? Just what defines love, anyway, and are all persocoms capable of experiencing it---even if that love is for another persocom?  
  
Chapter One: This Room  
  
This city has no people.  
  
They are all inside with them, and yet, this world consisting of them and the people who love them is not a cold and lonely place.  
  
Because the lights within the buildings, and the houses, where they are are warm, heightened by their love for the people that love them, and the happiness that both parties experience because of this love.  
  
This room in which I live is also warm, because I live with someone like myself (one of them), and the person she loves, who loves her in return.  
  
I am one of them. This room in which I live is warm...and cold...and lonely...and dark. I can not tell the difference, because I am one of them. I am not alive. We are not alive. We can not feel, or experience such emotions as humans do, love and pain, happiness and sadness.  
  
And yet they do, or at least, their program-defined emotions are made real by the people who love them and wish for nothing more than to have that love returned.  
  
But what if there is no person to love one of them? Can they still feel? Can they still find happiness, without a person to bring those emotions into existence? 


	2. Confusion

She'd gotten used to the noise, so when it came, it didn't shock her out of sleep mode as it had in the beginning.  
  
It was still disturbing, though, and for a second Kotoko considered wrapping the cord of that _damned whistle_ around Sumomo's neck,seeing whether strangulation also worked the same for persocoms as it did for humans. It would make things a lot quieter, at any rate.  
  
She was jostled out of her murderous thinking as Chi stepped on her in her shuffle to keep up with Sumomo's spastic exercise moves.  
  
"Chi is sorry!" The amber-eyed persocom cried cheerfully, almost inaudible against the maddening din of Sumomo and that _damned whistle_.  
  
Kotoko leveled a glare at the entire scene, gracefully gathering her robes and lumbering off into a corner to watch the unfolding scene of madness as Sumomo's antics with that _damned whistle_ caused Chi's nightgown to slip down to pool around her waist, sending Hideki into a flurry of 'embarrassed body reactions'. Kotoko didn't really feel like analyzing the improbability of them all. " The powers that be have obviously got it in for me today," she muttered, turning to stare out the window at the ever thickening crowd of persocoms and people moving along the street, most holding hands in an expression of some emotion that she herself possessed an inability to understand.  
  
They all looked so happy, she noted, even the persocoms themselves, despite the logical impossibility of a machine (which they were, which she herself was) experiencing any type of emotion. Those twists and turns of the brain were reserved for humans only, and Kotoko had accepted both that as well as the fact that she herself was a persocom. There wasn't really a great deal for analyzation there. It was just that, flesh and metal, with no fantasized mesh between the two. Their happiness, their sadness, was all a block of coding within their programming.  
  
A tiny finger tapped her on the shoulder, breaking her train of thought, and Kotoko didn't bother to turn around, already aware of who it was. " What do you want?"  
  
Sumomo grabbed the other laptop's shoulders, bodily spinning her around and greeting her with a smile that sometimes outshone even Chi's. " Sumomo wants Kotoko to join in, too!"  
  
"And Kotoko wants Sumomo to let go of her, turn around, and go get smashed by a car. Preferably beyond the point of repair. Along with that _damned whistle_ that Sumomo uses to summon the forces of evil. Then Kotoko can go back to blissfully hating life."  
  
Sumomo either didn't follow Kotoko's response, or she didn't care. "Aww," she whined, making an almost realistic expresssion of the sad puppy dog variety. " Kotoko needs to exercise to stay fit and healthy!"  
  
Kotoko raised an eyebrow. " Where'd you get that little tidbit of essentially useless information? The back of the milk carton?"  
  
Sumomo looked vaguely offended. " No, Sumomo didn't!! She got it off the back of the soba box!"  
  
...  
  
"Yeah," Kotoko muttered. " But Kotoko's hoping for an extremely short life, so the elevation of her health is not exactly a priority."  
  
"ANNYWAAY, Kotoko MUST exercise to prevent fat thighs!" Sumomo chirped, fluttering around in her Middle Eastern-style genie garments. " A lack of proper exercise only leads to weight gain and heart disease!"  
  
"I can't gain weight, you dimwit!! I'm a persocom! And so are YOU for that matter! How can you possibly be crazy when you don't even have a mind to LOSE?"  
  
At this point Hideki stumbled upon Chi rooting through his collection of porn magazines and screamed.  
  
Kotoko sighed. " I guess the existence of one of the demons of stupidity in such close proximity explains everything."  
  
Sumomo cocked her head in an intrested manner. " Is Kotoko sad?"  
  
Kotoko blinked. " You can form normal sentences?"  
  
"Of course Sumomo can form normal sentences! Sumomo is NOT stupid."  
  
"Could've fooled me."  
  
Sumomo stuck her tongue out and blew her a raspberry. Kotoko ignored her. " No, Kotoko is not sad."  
  
"But Kotoko looks sad. Kotoko always looks sad. Kotoko should be happy, like Sumomo!"  
  
"When did you gain the ability to analyze my non-existent emotions?"  
  
"Sumomo knows that when Chi-san smiles, Chi-san is happy, and when Chi-san looks upset, Chi-san is sad. So Sumomo wants Kotoko to smile, so she can be happy!"  
  
Kotoko paused, staring at the pink laptop in confusion. Generally, Sumomo was the personification of hyper, dancing and flitting from one random topic or activity to another in completely random order. They'd interacted, in their strange way, but Kotoko could never imagine having even the most rudimentary normal conversation with her peer, not in the manner of some of the persocoms she'd encountered.  
  
And here she was, all traces of insanity gone, staring at Kotoko with a troubled expression. As if she cared. As if she were capable of caring.

recording -- 0:00  
  
"Why do you care if I'm happy or not?"  
  
Sumomo smiled her brilliant smile and hugged Kotoko tightly. " Because Sumomo loves Kotoko-chan!" Her eyes suddenly glassed over, characteristic of some mechanical process taking place. "Ring, ring!!" She shouted in her cheerful voice, running off to alert Hideki of the incoming phone call, and leaving Kotoko standing stunned.  
  
recording stopped -- 3:41. replay.  
  
"Why do you care if I'm happy or not?"  
  
"Because Sumomo loves Kotoko-chan!"  
  
replay. 2:55 - 3:26  
  
"Because Sumomo loves Kotoko-chan!"  
  
stopped. saving video file in personal folder.  
  
"Because Sumomo...loves Kotoko...chan...." Kotoko murmured, staring at the pink laptop dancing around Hideki in an attempt to get his attention. " Because someone....loves...me? But..."  
  
She realized what she was doing, realized the futility of the situation and snapped out of it, turning away again. However, somehow the scene below the window was dimmed, as if a cloud had passed over the sun, somewhat darkening the world around her. She had memories, of a time when the scene she'd just witnessed had occured in a slightly different manner, memories that were too painful to replay. Or remember.

You can't feel pain. You're a persocom. So is she. It's just her programming, nothing more.  
  
" Sumomo...chan..." she whispered to herself, withdrawing into her digital mind. 


	3. Emptiness

I should delete the file I just created, because it takes up space and is completely unnecessary.  
  
Completely. Just another one of Sumomo's inane ravings. I see them 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, for who knows how long until my processor can't take it anymore and malfunctions of it's own accord to save me from the madness.  
  
Or it would, were it able to make such a decision.  
  
And yet...I can't.  
  
I can't bring myself to let go of that moment in time, when, for the first time, I became something more than just a persocom, than just a machine. Someone capable of being loved, for just being herself.  
  
And I can't bring myself to revisit the feeling of disappointment upon realizing the impossibility of such a ridiculous fairy tale. That I can be loved. That I CAN love.  
  
Kotoko is a machine, an expensive investment for a specific purpose--the use of my abilities to further my master's knowledge.  
  
A machine.  
  
I tell myself this, with every flutter that I know is whatever I call a heart, with every smile or laugh or expression of pain I supress. This is normal. This is what I am. This is my 'life'-emptiness. Emptiness that I can never overcome.  
  
Then why? Why do I feel these urges...to smile, at Sumomo's antics, when she grabs my hand and forces me to join her in a stupid dance? To burst out laughing at Hideki's nosebleeds and Chi's innocent expressions?  
  
To break, to stop working completely when I cycle through the memories of the time before these crazy, irrational, semi-psychotic people I'm forced into living with?  
  
Am I malfunctioning again?  
  
Like before?  
  
Am I broken?  
  
Because Sumomo loves Kotoko-chan!"  
  
why does this happen? i'm not suppossed...to feel this way..anymore...  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------  
  
accessing personal folder  
  
total video files: 4876  
  
searching for file...happybirthday.mpeg  
  
play: happybirthday.mpeg 0:00  
  
She slowly opens her lavender-tinted eyes, much like a child looking upon the world for the first time..without the excess noise.  
  
"Hello, little Kotoko."  
  
Her vision is highly unfocused, and although she can hear the voice, the image that goes along with it is blurred.  
  
adjusting visual receptors  
  
She looks around in an outward expression of confusion, until the world around her clears and she lays eyes on him for the first time. His smile is warm, and friendly, his ebony eyes glittering with somethin she can't place.  
  
"Don't try to talk yet. Your voice recognition system is active but the response program hasn't fully loaded."  
  
She stares at him in silence, her lightning fast mind identifying and defining each word as they pass through her audio receptors, making sense of this new situation. Even if she could talk...could she say anything? What would she say? A tinge of fear passes through her. Being suddenly thrust into existence with no identity, no purpose...she's not even sure of who she is.  
  
And then it happens. He reaches out to her, causing her to cringe slightly, then lifts her in his arms, and she can feel the warm, the vibration of his heartbeat as he cradles her against his chest with a sigh of happiness.  
  
"You're finally finished. You took forever, but then again, I guess your status as possibly the most advanced persocom of your size negates the amount of time and effort." He hugs her as one would a child, as though the months he's spent working toward her creation bonds her to him. "I'm happy you turned out the way you did, though. My powerful little Kotoko-chan."  
  
**happy**  
  
_adj_ 1: enjoying or showing or marked by joy or pleasure or good fortune  
  
Happy...because you have me? I make you happy?  
  
The knowledge of her effect on her creator wipes away any fear remaining within her, causing her to smile and hug him back to the best of her abilities. These expressions are foreign to her, and yet, they...feel...right.  
  
video file paused at 6:45  
  
---------------------------------------------  
  
These memories ravage me, reminding me of what I left behind, why I chose to leave it, and what I've found...and what I know will never last. Of what my old master...no, Kojima-chan taught me.  
  
Things Sumomo will never understand, or Chi, because their damned innocence entraps them in a world of light where anything is possible.  
  
As I watch Chi, I can't help but feel a twinge of the old jealousy I harbored toward her. I've pretty much gotten over my hatred of her--she's so sweet and innocent that it's maddening, but you can't really hate her all that badly. No, I realize that she aided me in more ways than I can ever thank her for, even if she remains clueless to this day; if not for her I'd still be trapped within the four walls of Yoshiyuki's mansion, where it's at least a great deal saner...and yet I can't think of how devestated I'd be if he decided to take me back now. I don't think he will, seeing how I betrayed him, but then again I've never known Yoshiyuki to let an investment go to waste. Which I am---one of his biggest investments, possibly his most advanced persocom. Of course, I'm sure he's replaced me by now, for something smaller, more expensive, and more advanced, if that's possible at this point. Not that it matters.  
  
Or does it? Why does it hurt to remember the time before? Why can't I just accept the emptiness that defines the mind of a machine? Why do I consistently do this to myself?  
  
So many questions, all of which I can't answer. I can calculate and answer anything, and yet I can't understand emotion, something that exists beyond my programming. That's right. I wasn't programmed to feel. Just to do.  
  
That why I envy Chi, sometimes. I envy whatever it is that allows her to smile without thinking, to show happiness, to be happy. To have found someone who loves her, even if the person that is 'Chi' is simply a program.  
  
I wish I could be happy, too.  
  
I'm sorry, Sumomo. I don't love you. I don't love anyone or anything. I can't. I have to remain a machine. It's too painful otherwise.  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Whoa. Three chapters at once. I got my mojo back! : ) Don't worry, people, it'll pick up soon, and I've got a definite destination in mind so bear with me, and give me all the constructive criticism you can muster!!  
  
--papi

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	4. Awareness

Kotoko's tormented reverie was broken once again, this time by Hideki, who was somewhat flustered and still sported a slight blush as a result of his and Chi's earlier escapades. She sighed inaudibly as she turned to face him as he approached, then kneeled to be at equal eye level with her perch on the windowsill.  
  
"Did you need something?" The laptop inquired coldly, causing Hideki to shudder inwardly, slightly surprised at the amount of animosity Kotoko could direct at him with a single glance. The persocom was incredibly useful, especially given his computer illiteracy (and the fact that, technically, Chi and Sumomo were essentially useless, at least as far as intellegence went, although Chi was improving); however, he had to admit that she rivaled some teachers that haunted his worst nightmares in her ability to convey a sufficient sense of the sentiment " I loathe every fibre of your being" without uttering a single word. Although the cold quality of her voice only served to heighten the effectiveness of that ability.  
  
"Um..Kotoko, I've got the late shift at work tonight, so you, Chi, and Sumomo'll be on your own after Chi gets in from Chiroru around 5, okay?"  
  
Kotoko's small face contorted into an expression of uncertainty in spite of herself. "You're letting Chi walk home alone?" Hideki sighed, obviously troubled by the idea. He'd never quite recovered from Chi's earlier abduction at the hands of Kotoko's former owner, and continued to accompany Chi to the bakery as often as possible, especially in the evenings. He knew it was probably simple paranoia, but given the events that unfolded in the few months since his discovery of Chi it was probably necessary, understandable paranoia, what with psychotic government 'coms patrolling the area and nerdy assholes like Kojima continuing to be allowed to run rampant in the streets. "There's really no other option...save having her take the day off, but you know she'd hate that." Once again, Kotoko felt the throes of jealousy preparing to rear their ugly heads and nipped them in the bud before they could completely surface. To hear him talk, she thought, rather bitterly, you'd think Chi was a regular human being, and not an, albeit cute, persocom suffering from the blonde complex. He'd seemingly forgotten that she wasn't, which was stupid on his part, in her opinion. Or was it? "Maybe she should take Sumomo with her in case she has to contact you," she offered sweetly, leaving out the hopeful "Maybe they'll both get lost again and I can live my miserable life in relative sanity." She didn't think Hideki would appreciate the idea.  
  
She herself didn't appreciate it when Hideki chuckled, ruffling her hair slightly. "You're not getting out of babysitting duty that easily, " he joked, jumping back slightly as the smaller persocom directed a look that could've killed in his direction.  
  
"Why am I being sentenced to purgatory for what my STUPID old master did?" Kotoko hissed, bristling as Sumomo blew that _damned whistle_ once again. It was official, she decided. She was going to kill her. Or at least tie her up with that dark instrument of evil she enjoyed piping so much. Hideki shuddered as well. "I really should just take it...but she might cry...again.."  
  
Kotoko eyed him critically. "She wasn't crying. She was making a pathetic squealing noise."  
  
Hideki looked down at her sympathetically, then rose to his feet, gently lifting the laptop in his hands. "I know it's different from what you're used to," he said in that kind voice that broke Kotoko's heart whenever she heard it, especially directed towards her, "But I'm really thankful for all your help, Kotoko. Especially in the Sumomo department."  
  
Kotoko allowed herself a tiny smile, looking away. "Oh, all right," she mumbled. "You don't have to flatter me. I'll make sure she doesn't break anything else."  
  
Hideki grinned, replacing the laptop on the windowsill. "Thanks, Kotoko- chan."  
  
what the hell is it with the chan suffix??  
  
She watched him silently as he rapidly tossed his various textbooks into his backpack, navigating the remaining porn magazines he had yet to dispose of. "Chi, time to go!"  
  
Chi bounced happily into the room, now adorned in one of her infamous frilly outfits, holding Sumomo in her arms. "Chi is ready!" she cried cheerfully, placing Sumomo on the windowsill next to Kotoko.  
  
"Bye master!!" Sumomo shouted in an equally cheerful voice, and for a second Kotoko wondered whether persocoms could experience the 'high' effect of being on drugs--nothing normal or holy was ever that cheerful before 8 o'clock in the morning. "Bye Chi-san!! Have a nice and happy day!"  
  
Chi leaned down to hug both laptops, a ritual she'd taken to only recently that she offered no explanation for. "Chi will be back at 5 pm," she informed them in the stern manner of a mother leaving her children to their own devices for the day. "Chi does not want Sumomo and Kotoko to answer the door for strangers...or cook without the proper safety equipment...or play with matches, because such behavior can be extremely dangerous.."  
  
Kotoko's mouth fell open as Chi rambled on a list of crimes in which she did not wish to see either laptop engaged in her absence, most of which didn't apply to either of them logically.  
  
Hideki caught himself right before crashing into a facefault. "Um..Chi?" he interrupted gently. " I'm sure they appreciate your concern...but I really don't think that either Sumomo or Kotoko will attempt to cook or play with matches. " He paused for a second. " Then again, Sumomo might, but Kotoko probably won't let her."  
  
"Oh." Chi stopped, looking at Hideki curiously. " Chi just does not want Kotoko and Sumomo to be hurt, because I love them!"  
  
Hideki smiled, grabbing Chi's hand, suddenly reminded of why he'd chosen to spend his life with her. "Let's go, Chi."  
  
temporary event replay: last 3 minutes. recording.  
  
"Chi just does not want Kotoko and Sumomo to be hurt, because I love them!"  
  
recording stopped at 0:30. video file saved in personal folder.  
  
The couple headed out the door to the sound of one of Sumomo's inspirational cheers, neither noticing the expression of pain on Kotoko's face. Maybe it was pain. Kotoko didn't notice it either.  
  
----------------------------------------------  
  
accessing personal folder  
  
locate video files dated 2/15/08  
  
total video files found: 345

sort files by: date time size length?  
  
sort value: date selected  
  
order: ascending? descending?  
  
ascending order selected  
  
cut selected files and move to new folder  
  
nestle within personal folder? Y N?  
  
new folder placed within root personal folder. rename?  
  
folder name: kojima-chan  
  
save changes to personal folder? Y N?   
  
changes saved. personal folder closed.  
  
---------------------------------------------  
  
Kotoko watched them leave, the door closing softly behind them, Sumomo's rather piercing chant finally coming to an end at their departure.  
  
Neither laptop said anything for a few seconds of precious silence. Then Sumomo cheered. "Sumomo and Kotoko are home alone!!"  
  
"I can barely contain my excitement." Kotoko deadpanned.  
  
"Kotoko knows what this means, right?"  
  
"You're going to shut yourself off in our dimwitted master's absence and remain silent for more than ten minutes?"  
  
Sumomo grinned. "No!!" The pink laptop nimbly jumped down from the windowsill and ran over to the small tv, grabbing the remote and waving it in Kotoko's direction as though it were a declaration of war. "Come on, Kotoko! TV time!!"  
  
Kotoko winced at the noise and ran over to Sumomo, snatching the remote from her. "Hideki can barely pay the bills without you wasting electricity and adding to his lack of a sizable income!" she scolded, ignoring Sumomo's 'sad puppy face' at the loss of her source of entertainment.  
  
"Kotoko-chan is boorring." Sumomo sighed. "Sumomo wants to play!"  
  
Kotoko tossed the remote on the carpet, taking on a threatening stance. "If Sumomo is bored, which is incredibly suprising for a persocom, given that they don't engage in other, self-assigned activites to give them an idea of what the concept of being bored even means, then Sumomo should turn herself off and help preserve Kotoko's sanity!"  
  
Sumomo sighed again. "But if Sumomo turns herself off, she'll be even more bored!"  
  
Kotoko felt her eye twitch and wondered whether her processor was finally going on the blink. "Sumomo, if you turn yourself off you won't be conscious of your boredom!"  
  
Sumomo seemed to consider this for a moment, and then nodded in agreement. "Sumomo must admit that Kotoko has a point..."  
  
Kotoko nearly crashed in shock. "Wow. We're actually in agreement on something." She looked towards the window, scanning the sky for burning debris. "Strange...there are no outward signs of the coming of the Apocalypse...and yet.."  
  
"VANDAL!!" Sumomo suddenly screamed, pointing toward the door. Kotoko jumped and whirled around. "What?"  
  
The sound of the small, cheap tv firing up was the only response she recieved, and the laptop turned around to see Sumomo hugging the remote to her chest, looking rather smug. "Sumomo thinks Kotoko is very gullible for a persocom," she commented mildly.  
  
Kotoko wasn't sure whether to be enraged at being fooled or to be suprised by the level of cunning Sumomo had demonstrated.  
  
She also wasn't sure what inane cartoon the pink laptop had immersed herself in, but at least she was quiet. And that was worth the expenditure of electricity. She decided to admit defeat and returned her favorite spot on the windowsill, where she could keep an eye on Sumomo.  
  
--------------------------------------------------  
  
Sometimes I wonder whether the person that programmed that little spectre was insane at the time. She acts like a child, in the most appalling manner that can cause you to forget that she is a normally functioning persocom at times.  
  
I suppose her most interesting is how noisy she is. I'm not sure what I think of the amount of madness she causes--it's not normal, and being a staunch supporter of the maintenance of normality I protest it...but I guess it's bearable.  
  
It was always so quiet, before, with my former master. There were other persocoms, over 20 of them, some still in the developmental stage...but none of them laughed, like Chi, or screamed, like Sumomo, or expressed any other form of personality save devoted servitude to our master, who was silent as well. That's probably why this new enviroment is so strange to me: I've never been around persocoms...or people...that act in the manner that my new roommates do.  
  
I'm not really sure how they expect me to react.  
  
I'm not sure I know how to react.  
  
In human etiquette, when someone says "I love you", I've noticed that usually the adressee replies in kind. As expected.  
  
I can never say those words.  
  
not anymore  
  
---------------------------------------------------  
  
opening folder: kojima-chan  
  
play video file: 2/15/08-1 0:00  
  
She could speak now, in a rudimentary sort of way, as her self-teaching programming only worked so swiftly. He'd told her he wanted her that way: he'd designed the program himself, and under it's influence she would begin to develop her own user interface without his interference. It was an experiment, of sorts.  
  
She wasn't sure what he meant by any of it, but she found that the sound of his voice somehow seemed right to her. Right. As if it were supposed to be. Much of the world around her was still a mystery, however, it was becoming clear. Slowly.  
  
She now perched in his arms as he showed her the floorplan of the house, allowing her to record the layout of rooms and equipment and sort out the twists and turns of the hallways. It was a lot of information for Kotoko to take at once, especially given the manner in which she was forced to percieve the area--by expanding the scope of her visual receptors and increasing her range of vision, then reseting them to take in minor detail. She wasn't sure what the purpose of this activity was, but if he wished her to do it, then she would. Willingly.  
  
They continued down the main hallway towards the living room, as he called it--and suddenly collided with the first person Kotoko had seem since opening her eyes. Kotoko clung to her master's arm to keep from falling, and the woman jumped back as Kojima straightened himself out. "My apologies, master." She murmured demurely, bowing and allowing her long blue hair to fall delicately over her face, and Kotoko blinked in confusion. He was her master as well?  
  
"No problem." Kojima replied coolly, holding the smaller persocom up to face the newcomer. "Kotoko, this is Yukino."  
  
"Yukino." Kotoko repeated, filing away the face and the name. "Is Yukino...a persocom as well, master?"  
  
"One among many." Kojima chuckled, and Yukino narrowed her eyes slightly.  
  
Kotoko looked up at her master with interest. "But Yukino is the same...height as master is!"  
  
"Yukino is an older model of persocom. I created her long before laptop persocoms with full-model capabilities came into style." Kotoko noticed that the light in Yukino's eyes diminished, her frown becoming more accentuated. What did her expression mean?  
  
"But if Yukino is older than I am...why am I smaller? Am I a less.." What was that word? "..advanced persocom than Yukino because of my size?"  
  
"Oh, don't worry, little Kotoko," Kojima replied airily, not without a touch of pride. "These days big things come in small packages. You're a hundred times more advanced than Yukino will ever be."  
  
Kotoko felt herself smile at the pride in his voice, once again feeling the twinge of something she had yet to identify as happiness at the thought of having made her master happy.  
  
And Yukino stared in silence, her cold green eyes watching the laptop in her master's arms with something Kotoko wouldn't be able to identify until much later.  
  
Hatred.  
  
video file paused 7:34 


	5. Memories: This Persocom

Memories  
  
Chapter Two: This Persocom  
  
The people I live with are very different from those before.  
  
This room is much smaller, much too small for four people, including myself, however, they are all happy.  
  
I know this, because this room is full of noise, happy noise and laughter and yells and sounds I never heard in my old house; sounds I'm not sure how to react to. Do I laugh? Do I yell? Or do I sit silently, and ponder the correct answers to these questions?  
  
There are two tall people, one person, and one of them, the two that love each other, and two small persocoms...myself...and her.  
  
As the days pass, my life falls into a pattern. The two tall people leave in the morning...and I am alone with her.  
  
She is strange, loud, and noisy, and never still; sometimes I find myself watching her in awe, because I have never seen one of them that behaves in such a manner. The day is long, and full of the madness which she radiates...and she constantly touches me, and speaks to me, as if I were something more than a persocom.  
  
As if I were a person. As if she could care. As if she cared. As if I could care as well. As if we were both something we will never be.  
  
And I feel what can only be happiness. Because someone sees me as more than I am.  
  
And I am confused. Can she care? Does she care? When she says she loves me, does she?  
  
Can she love me?  
  
And can I love her? Why would I? 


	6. Interest

opening personal folder  
  
opening file folder: kojima-chan  
  
play video file 2/22/08 0:00  
  
It had been slightly over a week since her 'birthday', as she'd begun to call the day her master had activated her, after researching human customs, and Kotoko was progressing quite rapidly. Her programming was quite intricate, as she was beginning to understand, a twisted network of miniature blocks of coding denoting 'normal' functions that would increase to define her higher functionality as her intelligence increased by way of the self-teaching program...which was almost like a human brain, she decided. It gave her the freedom to determine which course of action to take when faced with a problem based on what she'd learned and filed away; as well as the intuition to research anything she didn't understand.  
  
It also made her master very happy that she was developing in such a manner- -she had image and video file after file stored away of his exhilarated expressions when she analyzed and completed a task or developed a solution to a problem not covered within her basic coding. Kotoko liked seeing her master smile. It meant, she'd learned, that she was fulfilling whatever purpose he'd had in creating her, and after a study of the emotions experienced by human beings Kotoko had determined that the 'feeling' she got when Kojima smiled was 'happiness', a strange yet interesting concept that she didn't quite understand, yet. Happiness was smiling, was experienced when things went correctly. Happiness was being useful, for a persocom, because it meant that you had a reason to exist, a reason to be. Persocoms were created to be useful and to bring joy to their masters, she'd read somewhere, and therefore determined that she was happy when Kojima was happy. She wasn't sure what part of her programming dictated how she experienced happiness or sadness.  
  
She especially wasn't sure whether she could feel at all after a rather disturbing conversation with her master, in which she began to question just how advanced she was.  
  
The day started off normally--her master awakened early (he allowed Kotoko to go into sleep mode at the top of his pillow, a position she viewed as being indicative of her place in the household--the master's favorite persocom) and left for the educational facility he called 'hell on Earth' (Kotoko had done research and discovered that the REAL name of his daily destination was school.) During the day, Kotoko either read the myriads of books lining the walls, or did research on events she'd witnessed. Occasionally she explored the huge mansion, and in the course of a week had discovered and made the acquaintance of somewhere over 15 different persocoms; however, she tended to avoid them as their height made her uncomfortable, as well as the empty looks in some of their eyes...and the contrasting looks of hatred she couldn't decipher. She'd seen Yukino, once, and Yukino had brushed past her without looking, her head held high, as if she couldn't be bothered to acknowledge the existence of the smaller persocom. Kotoko was acutely confused.  
  
Her days took on a much brighter tone when her master returned late in the afternoons, almost immediately scooping her up and going off into a ramble concerning whatever irked him about his experiences in the human world; it was during these rambling complaints that Kotoko learned a great deal of words consisting of four and five letters, sometimes seven, that caused Kojima to leap in surprise when she repeated them. She found she didn't mind the useless information--the sound of his voice caused her mechanical heart to race, to spark with energy, for some reason, as well as being lifted into his arms.  
  
It was during one of these one-sided conversations that Kotoko posed the question that had been on her mind for some time. "Master, do I make you happy?"  
  
Kojima paused, looking at her curiously. "Why?"  
  
"It is my purpose to make you happy, is it not?"  
  
"I guess..." Kojima trailed off, realizing that he had not programmed a set goal in existence for the laptop. "Why do you ask?"  
  
Kotoko smiled. "Because when you're happy, I feel happy."  
  
Kojima shook his head, chuckling. "Oh, really?" He placed the small persocom on the floor, causing Kotoko to frown slightly. "Kotoko, what is happiness?"  
  
"Smiling."  
  
"A smile is an expression of happiness, true, but what exactly is happiness?"  
  
Kotoko was silent, wondering how she could define the emotion. "The state of being glad or pleased," she offered, using the dictionary definition.  
  
"But what is happiness?" Kojima pressed.  
  
Kotoko didn't answer. How could she possibly put the trembling of what she believed was her heart in words?  
  
"Happiness is a human emotion, Kotoko." Kojima explained. "Humans have the capacity to experience happiness, among other emotions because their minds are unlimited. Persocoms are fenced in by their programming—they don't have the ability to experience emotions."  
  
Kotoko started to reply, but was cut off by Kojima continuing, "Granted, you're extremely advanced, but it's just not possible that you can experience happiness, or any other emotion. You may have learned what denotes happiness, however, your 'emotions' are just the result of reaching a conclusion you've set as being the requirements for being either happy, or sad, or angry. Get it?"  
  
Kotoko shook her head. Kojima smiled, patting her on the head gently. "You'll learn the limits of a persocom eventually. No matter how advanced it is, a machine can never act outside it's programming. Or cross the line between persocoms and humanity."  
  
He walked away, leaving Kotoko staring at his retreating form.  
  
"But I don't...have any programming." She said to no one in particular.  
  
video file stopped 15:12  
  
---------------------------------------------

They watched what Kotoko believed to be possibly the most pointless television programming in existence for several hours--of course, it was full of people running around in an insane manner and screaming and making unnecessary noise, which she dealt with on a daily basis, so it was really nothing new, and there was nothing of any value to learn except some cultural information on Doraemon, and that in itself frightened her.  
  
The only real advantage was that Sumomo more or less remained relatively quiet, except for childish laughter and random comments on certain aspects of the cartoons (and commercials) that were either nonsensical or so extremely accurate that Kotoko nearly crashed again.  
  
She wondered what type of programming Sumomo had. It appeared to be rudimentary, a simple personality program defining the strange manner in which she behaved, however, she did find it interesting that, in the few months she'd been residing with the Motosuwa household, both Sumomo and Chi had changed slightly in their mannerisms. Chi was certainly becoming much more mature and intelligent, but that was no real surprise to Kotoko, given her advanced programming. Sumomo, on the other hand, had become much more expressive...like a child. She laughed, she sang, she smiled constantly and ran at loud noises.  
  
It was almost as if the laptop were developing a personality of her own, beyond whatever programming she had. It wasn't impossible, Kotoko mused, as Sumomo cheerfully sang "Ai no Senshi" without missing a beat. Persocoms could very easily develop beyond their basic programming, especially placed within new situations. That was one of their advantages over antiquitated computers of the last millennium--when they ran into an unfamiliar situation they crashed, unable to function. However, most persocoms were able to analyze the situation and choose a manner in which to react; and normally, in the event of the situation being recurring, they set their initial reaction or solution to the problem as a norm. In this manner, a persocom's personality could become altered without interference from their owner. She knew Chi had changed somewhat, as well as a persocom owned by an acquaintance of her former master, Yuzuki. Could Sumomo?  
  
A slight snoring sound got her attention, and Kotoko discovered that Sumomo had slipped into sleep mode, probably as a result of energy expenditure. Persocoms did get tired, especially when they cavorted and spent more time in motion that any sane human being. At least with her 'napping', Kotoko could get some work done without worrying about Sumomo doing anything potentially dangerous.  
  
She paused, then smiled in spite of herself at the 'sleeping' laptop, who'd curled up like a kitten, her tiny mouth slightly open as she 'snored'. She had to admit that Sumomo was 'cuter', in her mannerisms, than many persocoms she'd met and interacted with.  
  
It was also not such a bad way to spend the day. It was definitely a 360- degree turnaround from Kojima's household...but that didn't necessarily mean it was bad.  
  
She noted that now would be the perfect time to research her earlier question--how was Sumomo programmed?  
  
Quietly opening one of her outfit's bells situated within her hair, Kotoko removed her connection cable used to link to another unit, somewhat worried that Sumomo would become active again at the intrusion; however, as she connected the cable to the reception port on Sumomo's hat, she decided that recharging would take more than 45 minutes, at least, and Sumomo would 'sleep' until she was fully recharged. Useful.  
  
As expected, Sumomo's security program protested the forced link; it was amazingly easy to disable. Kotoko smiled grimly--not all Kojima's gifts with which he'd imbued her were exactly legal, but they served their purposes.  
  
link to unit : 'Sumomo  
  
access source coding for 'Sumomo'  
  
translate into pseudocode? Y N?  
  
Kotoko paused momentarily. Pseudocode, a mixture of coding and English defining the purpose of the code, was much faster than interpreting unfamiliar code, and she needed to work as swiftly as possible--she didn't want to think how Sumomo would react to having been hacked into. Part of her was worried that the laptop would not only alert Hideki but would cease the affection she exhibited towards Kotoko, and as annoying as it was, she was accepting it as part of her new life.  
  
She might have even liked it, to a degree.  
  
Y N?  
  
Y  
  
translating source coding for unit 'Sumomo' into pseudocode...processing..  
  
"Come on," Kotoko muttered. Sumomo's coding couldn't possibly be so complex that it took this freaking long to download and translate. Could it?  
  
source code translation complete  
  
Kotoko's eyes glazed over as she viewed the lines and lines of code, it's definition highlighted in red pseudocode beside each block. She'd never expected Sumomo's programming to be this organized. Pseudocode defining each of her dances, in detail, as well as that allowing her to improvise upon the preprogrammed coding after viewing and recording dance movements...personality programming...  
  
Kotoko paused. Sumomo's personality coding was, as she'd expected, malleable...with only one defined characteristic: cuteness. Based on what she could understand of this program, or lack of thereof, was that it mirrored her own self-teaching program, allowing Sumomo to research behavioral characteristics within the defined boundary and exhibit them at her discretion.  
  
Well, that explained a lot. So she wasn't crazy. She was cute.  
  
"The two are interchangeable in some language, no doubt," Kotoko sighed. Having answered her original question, and wanting to consider the answer more fully at her leisure, she started to disconnect...then had second thoughts. There was one more question about the laptop eating at her, and it would be an invasion of privacy to answer it.  
  
so? she's just a persocom.  
  
"So am I," Kotoko thought decisively. "I'm beginning to sound like Kojima." She remained motionless for a second, then, whispering, "I'm sorry, Sumomo," sought out the laptop's source coding once more.  
  
locating active programs: predefined  
  
Predefined programs were like her self-teaching program: the general basis allowing for improvision upon the manner in which the program played itself out.  
  
currently active predefined programs: 6  
  
Kotoko sighed inwardly in relief. Even though the small amount of predefined programs didn't necessarily mean that she would have any less work, it did make searching through them for what she was looking for a bit easier. "Dictionary software....navigation interface....personality self- teaching program...." Kotoko trailed off, having found something strange. The program was embedded, hidden within another, and strangely, it was unmarked as well, as if one of Sumomo's improvisions upon her coding.  
  
It was also self-written.  
  
separate block of coding from base code  
  
translate into pseudocode  
  
personality programming parameters: cute  
  
cute: causing pleasure or happiness to another through one's mannerisms  
  
if my function is to behave in a cute manner, then is bringing happiness considered cute?  
  
the causing of positive emotion in another being is not directly a cause of being considered cute by such an individual  
  
happiness increases chances of behavior being viewed as such  
  
determine unhappiness, sadness, anger in individual  
  
attempt to alleviate emotion  
  
bring happiness to individual lacking such emotion  
  
select block of coding  
  
copy  
  
save as text file in personal folder  
  
And, as if somehow aware of the occurrence, Sumomo smiled in her 'sleep.'  
  
And Kotoko felt as if she would cease functioning correctly, as she accessed Sumomo's personal folder blindly and discovered that Sumomo had a great deal of images and video files of herself and Kotoko, just as she herself did.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----

That was a long one! Is my direction any clearer now? Come on, people, Papi needs to know if she sucks or not! Although I'm not exactly disappointed with my work so far...oh, by the way, the computer terms regarding Sumomo's programming is a mixture of my Visual Basic programming knowledge, so even though it looks as if the above is saying a lot for our insane little Plum, remember, everything is defined within the code. The indicates Sumumo's pseudocode, a single being Kotoko analyzing it. (Crap, I sound like a nerd...) And I know I'm probably writing Kotoko's functions incorrectly, so if anyone's aware of correct computer jargon can you please drop me a line so that I cease making an ass of myself? Oh, by the way, Doraemon is a Japanese children's cultural icon (a robotic cat that grants wishes, to my knowledge), and 'Ai no Senshi' is a group song from the Japanese version of Sailor Moon R. I figured 'Moonlight Densetsu' was abused to the point of mass hatred in the series...Sumomo sure is up to date on her pop culture, isn't she?


End file.
